Have you ever walked out of an audition so successful that your hands still carry the remnants of food from which the casting directors, directors and producers just ate out of? So successful that you call your agent immediately to tell them to expect the deal to come out of the metaphorical bag you have just put 'it' in.
Then the phone call never comes. As the days tick dangerously close to the shooting dates (which of course you know as you've stalked your emails so many times you could schedule their production for them), you being worry. But you're still in denial. They loved you so much, how could they not cast you? Surely it's because your agent is sorting out the best deal and production are currently hiring the hottest interior designers to pimp out out dressing room. Then we surpass the shoot dates, you're still home watching daytime TV, and your agent calls you not with news with the production, but randomly to ask you if you can speak Russian with a Polish accent.
And then it dawns. Hey, maybe I didn't get the job?
Cue black hole of despair filled with [delete as appropriate]: anger, injustice, stupidity at misplaced self-belief, betrayal, jealousy, inadequacy, towel throwing etc., etc.
Conversely, ever come out of a casting feeling like the most useless human being ever to have (un)graced this earth, hearing nails being hammered into the coffin every time the director spoke to you, 'It's OK, we don't need to read the next scene', (bang), 'I've seen all I needed to see', (bang), 'Thanks so much for coming', (bang bang bang). You lie to your agent telling them how well it went, as you nurse yourself over some nicotine and caffeine and any other legal drug to suppress the sheer horror of what just happened. As soon as word spreads of how awful you are, you may as well quit the industry, so fuck it, let's speed up the process and inhale deeper on this cancer stick...
Then just as you get over the trauma of that black dot in your memory, your agent calls you out of the blue, tells you how much the production love you and want to cast you.
What?
You hide your surprise, nay, shock, as you regret smoking all those aging cigarettes as you're imminently about to be thrust into the limelight.
Does this sound at all familiar to you?
We want to know immediately if we got the job. Who wouldn't? You don't spend hours making a meal only to walk away from it to eat in 3 weeks time. Fine, it would have rotted away by then, but you get my gist. We live in a fast paced world and want to see the output of our input ASA-bloody-P. In instances where results are not immediately available, we cleverly try to figure it out for ourselves. We read into anything and everything about the audition to gauge success or lack of. I perhaps am more neurotic than most, but even after 5 years of auditioning and working, I still do it. As much as I try not to, my brain engages as soon as I'm out the door and thus begins a process of filtration: why you won't get the job/why you will get the job.
Here are some instances where I have not got the job despite the following:
What I'm trying to say is that you just don't know. You really don't. Even after years of experience, I thought I'd hone my radar a bit better, but actually, it's got worse. I don't know what the decision is when I come out of the room, and most likely, the people in the room don't either. If you're auditioning for TV and film, more often than not, the people who make or break you are not in the room. It doesn't matter how much you charm them at the meeting, or how much you laugh (of course it helps, as that makes you a likely person (translated: good colleague)), which goes a long way, but they do not tape this bit.
What really matters, sorry to say it, is how good you are on tape, and how well you fit the idea of what they're looking for. If you act well, but do not look like the picture in the execs' heads, you're unlikely to get the job. If you're a dick, you tape well and look like the spit, you'll probably get it (and then perhaps fired for being a dick). If you tick all three boxes, then the job is yours. Unfortunately, you don't know what they're thinking, what their minds eye sees, so the 'feeling' you get, only caters for 1/3 of the magic mixture.
Interestingly, at a recent casting, I was sent an image of what my character was supposed to look like. I looked at her and I knew instantly that if I read well, had a good time at the casting, I would get the job.
And guess what? I did. Is it really that simple?
Then the phone call never comes. As the days tick dangerously close to the shooting dates (which of course you know as you've stalked your emails so many times you could schedule their production for them), you being worry. But you're still in denial. They loved you so much, how could they not cast you? Surely it's because your agent is sorting out the best deal and production are currently hiring the hottest interior designers to pimp out out dressing room. Then we surpass the shoot dates, you're still home watching daytime TV, and your agent calls you not with news with the production, but randomly to ask you if you can speak Russian with a Polish accent.
And then it dawns. Hey, maybe I didn't get the job?
Cue black hole of despair filled with [delete as appropriate]: anger, injustice, stupidity at misplaced self-belief, betrayal, jealousy, inadequacy, towel throwing etc., etc.
Conversely, ever come out of a casting feeling like the most useless human being ever to have (un)graced this earth, hearing nails being hammered into the coffin every time the director spoke to you, 'It's OK, we don't need to read the next scene', (bang), 'I've seen all I needed to see', (bang), 'Thanks so much for coming', (bang bang bang). You lie to your agent telling them how well it went, as you nurse yourself over some nicotine and caffeine and any other legal drug to suppress the sheer horror of what just happened. As soon as word spreads of how awful you are, you may as well quit the industry, so fuck it, let's speed up the process and inhale deeper on this cancer stick...
Then just as you get over the trauma of that black dot in your memory, your agent calls you out of the blue, tells you how much the production love you and want to cast you.
What?
You hide your surprise, nay, shock, as you regret smoking all those aging cigarettes as you're imminently about to be thrust into the limelight.
Does this sound at all familiar to you?
We want to know immediately if we got the job. Who wouldn't? You don't spend hours making a meal only to walk away from it to eat in 3 weeks time. Fine, it would have rotted away by then, but you get my gist. We live in a fast paced world and want to see the output of our input ASA-bloody-P. In instances where results are not immediately available, we cleverly try to figure it out for ourselves. We read into anything and everything about the audition to gauge success or lack of. I perhaps am more neurotic than most, but even after 5 years of auditioning and working, I still do it. As much as I try not to, my brain engages as soon as I'm out the door and thus begins a process of filtration: why you won't get the job/why you will get the job.
Here are some instances where I have not got the job despite the following:
- The casting director told me I was the best person for the job;
- I went to the casting director's house on a Sunday for a recall as that was my only available day; the producer and director were also there;
- The casting director has chased me out the room to ask me further questions regarding my taking of the job;
- I was perfect for the role.
- I was late to the casting. The casting director then waited for me to take off my coat, get my script out, return fro the toilet, very much with 'hurry the fuck up' eyes;
- I had one line to read, I fluffed and ask for retakes;
- I was going through a break up and emotionally messed up;
- Doing an accent I cannot do (this later did come back to bite me on the ass during filming!)
What I'm trying to say is that you just don't know. You really don't. Even after years of experience, I thought I'd hone my radar a bit better, but actually, it's got worse. I don't know what the decision is when I come out of the room, and most likely, the people in the room don't either. If you're auditioning for TV and film, more often than not, the people who make or break you are not in the room. It doesn't matter how much you charm them at the meeting, or how much you laugh (of course it helps, as that makes you a likely person (translated: good colleague)), which goes a long way, but they do not tape this bit.
What really matters, sorry to say it, is how good you are on tape, and how well you fit the idea of what they're looking for. If you act well, but do not look like the picture in the execs' heads, you're unlikely to get the job. If you're a dick, you tape well and look like the spit, you'll probably get it (and then perhaps fired for being a dick). If you tick all three boxes, then the job is yours. Unfortunately, you don't know what they're thinking, what their minds eye sees, so the 'feeling' you get, only caters for 1/3 of the magic mixture.
Interestingly, at a recent casting, I was sent an image of what my character was supposed to look like. I looked at her and I knew instantly that if I read well, had a good time at the casting, I would get the job.
And guess what? I did. Is it really that simple?